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Name Alex
B-day Jan 9th, 1988
Age 19
Gender Male
Grade College
Music Rock and trance
Other <3 Art & writing
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We all come from the same species and same place yet amongst ourselves we learn to fight, kill and hate we learn to kill innocents start wars and kill people for their gender, preferences or race when we're children, we're all so innocent minded and it makes you wonder what happens to all that innocence that within us resided for now, we fight amongst ourselves brothers and sisters this world is so sick corrupted and twisted put down our weapons and join by the hands love each other like we should, and we can we need to let go, to stop all these fights instead we should focus to love, and unite

-- Alex


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Name: Alex
Country: Canada
State: Ontario
Birthday: 1/9/1988
Gender: Male


Interests: art, poetry, gaming, friends
Expertise: arts


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MSN: chaoticdarkness@hotmail.com
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Member Since: 5/14/2005

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Friday, October 26, 2007

Currently Listening
Flyleaf
By Flyleaf
Breathe Today
see related

Revelations and questions

There's people who wonder about the meaning of life, what our purpose is... I wonder that myself too sometimes

But more importantly, I think the most important question isn't "what is the meaning of life" but rather, "what was the means that really brought life to earth"

I'll be honest, I'm not a religious person, I find religion interesting, but I never really want to follow it. Perhaps, I do believe there is more to this world than we allow ourselves to believe, though I don't believe in any certain God(s) or Deity, I think you can never ignore the possibilities that there may be more to the world than we allow ourselves.

Really, I don't care about whether in the end I'm wrong or right, I just wanna know why people fight, argue, and to some extent go to much extreme cases such as killing all in the name of their God....

I don't think it's right...

even more so..

if a God were real
and is really someone benevolent...

would he be a jealous, racist, prejudist, sexist and contradictive entity as most people perceive him to be, without notice?

I mean, people are born into their beliefs sometimes, and it would be wrong to punish someone who was born and raised to only believe what they learn...a muslim will probably not change, a christian won't change, etc etc.

So really, it's more of this deadlock it ends up becoming..because everyone thinks they're right, and they clearly aren't any more correct than anyone else..to that extent even science is probably just as equally lacking in it's own proof, since even they contradict themselves so often in their research, and if not now..someone in a few years would argue their point.

My point is though, that if God real, and he is benevolent, people born into these situations shouldn't be punished, as what they believe in isn't their fault, that's just the environment they're brought up in. Yet, in the bible, or otherwise, many people are killed for these very reasons. If killing is a sin, why does it make any difference if you kill in the name of God? because he gave you permission..please..that's contradictive, it's not their fault, people aren't more pure or less pure because of their beliefs they're just coming from a different part of the spectrum, and whatever they hear of another religion seems strange to them, as anything from another religion would seem to oneself.

Anyhow, I don't care if anyone reads this..really I give up on my xanga, I just post here to rant, or let out some of my thoughts...

I think people should be less stubborn and accept the fact that no one is more correct than anyone else, but that is stubborness on my own part..since well...I know that wouldn't happen.

Oh well
too bad I guess
haha

-Alex


Sunday, September 23, 2007

Currently Listening
Misery Business
By Paramore
Misery Business
see related

This needs to stop.

*sigh* Why can't life be just more simple..and be just blessed with more well-minded people..

Why can't an someone learn from their mistakes all the time, and try to make a difference for the better within themselves..

Why, must some people, be such morons...who just have such a blaitant disregard for common sense..or the forgiveness of another being.

When you've been given a second chance, you should know better
when you've been given another chance, you've definitely got people who want something better for you
when you're still given another chance, despite your errors, and stupidity, you honestly need to just take a good look at yourself..and slap some sense into yourself, and make those necessary changes..because sooner or later, these chances won't last forever..and you'll just end up rotting away, in your own despair..

*sigh*

Why, why must there be people, who are just such idiots, that even they can't learn a simple lesson, of remorse, to live..and to learn


And why...why on earth, are the great people, who forgive these imbeciles, put to so much suffering..by seeing their efforts go to waste, time and time again...

Some people are just to forgiving, too loving...
and they're the ones who put themselves on the line, to defend people, who are just so uncaring, and stupid.

Family shouldn't be like this, family should be a force, of unity, love, and trust, but because of one bad seed, everything could just end in tragedy, guilt and hatred for some or all parts of this "family"

I wish, that the person, whom I'm thinking of, could read this right now, because they, have no respect, for a family member, who has put her life on the line constantly, to defend us, to support us, and to love us...

Gratitude, just doesn't seem to be apparent in this individual, because...they've been given more than enough chances to fix themselves
TOO MANY in fact

and I just want this suffering to end...even if it means, that I have to lose a family member, dear, and close...but they've screwed up too many times, they've been given more than enough chances, and there doesn't seem to be a thought of turning away, to a better path in them...

so please...
just make this stop..
just go away...
and everything will be alright again..






Monday, July 23, 2007

Currently Listening
Zeitgeist
By Smashing Pumpkins
Doomsday Clock
see related

Time.

Have you ever just  thought and wondered about how long your lifespan has been? Then suddenly realize, it really seems much longer than you'd think.

Here I am, 19 years old, and my childhood already seems so far behind...it's almost difficult to believe how much time has passed sometimes, because in my case..my childhood was basically during the 1990's. It makes me think I was so naive to the passage of time, I never really understood much of it until now. I realize that..wow most of my childhood is almost a decade behind me now

I remember, once I was already going to grade school, and interacted with my friends, we were always talking about the most recent cartoons..and to me, though I was born in 1988, the 80's just seemed so distant to me..even by the time I was in grade 3-5...I honestly couldn't care more about the decade beforehand...but until recently, I realized..wow..so much time has gone by.

Myself having 2 younger brothers, both in different generations...speaking with them, when I try to relate my own memories to theirs, they  can't recall or relate to things I remember. For instance, television shows..for me Saturday morning cartoons were something I lived for like most typical kids back during the 90's..and with my friends, they'll usually be able to rememember things just as well as I can...but with my brothers it's just a look of absolute confusion like

More interesting is what I find, that a decade ago the things I saw on television and stuff...I couldn't get enough of, and now all I see is remake after remake, of either movies, shows, or cartoons. It also makes me wonder realize how different things become over generations, things have to modernize, they have to change...being very different from what I remember to the generations of this decade.

For me, my childhood is still very fresh in my memory, either things I'd done with my friends, things I'd done, things I'd seen..they all seem very fresh until I realize...wow, most of that stuff is from almost over 10 years ago

I suppose the passage of time creeps up on all of us, and we're almost unaware, all we can do is remember...either way, it's good to have so many good memories, and see how things change over the years, though for me..they'll never be as good as I remember them



Thursday, July 05, 2007

Currently Listening
Stories and Alibis
By Matchbook Romance
Monsters
see related

This week..

hmm, definitely different than doing nothing for once LOL

this week...I didn't do anything on Canada Day to be honest lol, though on Monday, it was still the long weekend...

my friends were planning something...to shoot each other with roman candles (fireworks) I didn't want to...seemed dangerous to me lol..

anyhow, they knew I didn't want to...so instead on Monday, we started off just going to a japanese restaurant, it was with my friends Cristian and Javed...it was nice, we at sushi and other random things..which was all really awesome!
something weird happened though..some random argument broke out not too far from the food court area...
and then some guy walked into the Domino's pizza at the mall, grabbed a marker, and drew all over the fridge :S
I didn't understand why..but they were swearing and yelling in another language...and then they called the security guard and things just got much worse..thankfully we left before it got any more serious! LOL

after that...my friends decided they would look for an area to use that night to shoot their fireworks..
so we went down to Streetsville, started walking down a railroad, and we ended up...somewhere very random at a Train Station in the middle of a forest..haha

then, my friends wanted to go INTO the forest...though there was a sign there...but we just ignored it..so we walked deep into the forest..and ended up at a river...I -THOUGHT- that would've been the end..

but no
lol

they're like "HEY why don't we cross the river?"
and I thought..OMG, are you guys kidding!
but no...they weren't kidding unfortunately lol

so...I ended up being dragged into this initially because my friend was my ride back home..and at first it wasn't too bad...but I thought we were just going to cross the river and that was it..

but no
lol

they instead decided to walk up the river...the water was gross! my friend was washing his face with it...I found that...disgusting lol

in any case, we kept going up the river...before we knew it..it had been over an hour already..and my friends' were in no mood to stop anytime soon..so we kept on going through the river...

it was painful! there were so many sharp rocks and stuff at the bottom and I kept stepping on them...or almost falling...I got out first eventually and just walked the last 40 minutes of our trip...but then we realized that we weren't really sure where the heck we were..

so we had to go up these really steep hills, and all the fences we kept finding had lots of barbed wire on them..so that wasn't going to happen lol. We kept on going further and further until we reached the local dam...it was nice to see all the stuff that was there...but still it was a heck of a mission to get there!...and we still realized there was no way back..

it had been OVER 2 and a half hours by this point...we ended up around my friends' area with a really tall fence being our only way back...I was pretty exhausted..and jumping that fence was a difficult thing for me to do after having injured my feet and stuff on the way there due to the rocks and all the branches we ran into...

either way..we made it back...

then we walked from there all the way to the Shoppers' Drugmart in the area...haha, we ran into a few friends...it was good to catch up lol

then we finished it off by playing a few arcade games..billiard games..and watching a bit of a soccer game...it was a fun day lol, tiring..but fun

besides that very eventful Monday....I'm working temporarily this week...which is nice, because I get money then! LOL

it's been fairly easy so far, and I get Friday off cause I'm doing something with my cousin...haha

I think it's been a good week so far...

I might see if I can go check out Transformers or something this week with some people..who knows, I'll have to wait and see I suppose :P

bye




Saturday, May 12, 2007

Currently Listening
The Paramour Sessions
By Papa Roach
Alive ('N Outta Control)
see related

good ol day =]

haha, this week has REALLY not been the best for me, worrying about college and various life aspects...

but today was pretty good, my brother went to see Spiderman 3, now I -really really- wanna go see it
talked to some old friends, fixed a bit of worries I've had..

I also apparently got a job!
the one I wanted to avoid...
but oh well..I guess I can't avoid it afterall

working with my father was something I wanted to avoid, too many issues there..too much anger towards him..but gladly I won't be working alongside him..he'll be in the same building, but it's very large..and he'll be a fair distance away from me..therefore my worries aren't so great, and I'll be getting paid much better than minimum wage..
$14/ hour, rather than the $7.75 I used to get at  my old job...it's much better I guess...

so at least that's -basically- good news..

besides that, since one of my brothers was out, I was at home with the kid I babysit, and my youngest brother and my neighbours' kid...
I took them to the park for a while, it was fun...made me remember being their age...haha, now I'm too old for the monkey bars, my feet touch the ground, the sliding pole doesn't seem as scary..

haha

it was fun, once we finished, I treated them all to ice cream, I saw one of my friends there, but I couldnt say anything cause she was sorta busy working haha, oh well

it made for a day pretty well spent...better than staying at home inside all day...

it was relaxing..

but I'm still worried ><

I have an ISU due either wednesday or this monday, I haven't started LOL

it's easy stuff...ugh, I should do it asap! >_<
~

GO LISTEN TO JAMIROQUAI, Virtual Insanity is such a good song x]



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